# 425 - Conversation with a Chicken

Moving day has been re-set to May 15th. The same buyers got their stuff together and will be closing on our house very soon. I wish we would have met the close date this month, but life happens.

Meanwhile, I get to enjoy my backyard chickens. Howdy and my grand-dog, Thor had a wonderful time romping around as the chickens were fed scraps from the kitchen.

 

And how is this next shot for the ULTIMATE in chicken poses?

 

 

Belle the Yorkie was here with Stefie as well, and she is still a turkey and a half! She is every emotion rolled into one little hair-ball! Such personality!

 

 

Howdy was hogging all the doggie toys and Thor began to howl with displeasure.

 

 

And the chickens discuss the fact that they are happy they don't get sloppy kisses from the four-legged furry creatures because they've paid attention to the things dogs do with their mouths. The chickens are not impressed.

 



 

Some chickens are more arrogant than others.

So, I decide to conduct a political chicken interview with The Little Red Hen I refer to as "Lil' Red." In case you didn't know, chickens LOVE to talk politics; they are quite opinionated and wise, in spite of their bird brains.

I ask, "Since you've not been laying eggs on a consistent basis lately, I decided we'd have a little chat. What do you think about being able to vote...can you give me a secret as to how to select the best candidate for the position?'

Lil Red answered, "I vote for whomever provides the most guaranteed feed."

I asked, "But, don't you like to scratch around and work to find your own goodies in the ground?"

"Oh Yes!," says Lil Red with a head jerking around with delicious thoughts, "I love those big juicy June Bugs, dragonfly crunch treats, wormy worms, and all kinds of insects!"

I scratch my head as Lil Red scratches the ground with her chicken claws, then I ask, "Doesn't it kind of suck to eat the provided store-bought food that your masters provide every day instead of enjoying a diet based solely on all the lovely things you can work to provide for yourself?"

Lil Red answered, "Sucks? Yes, it sucks to not have a bucket full of bugs to eat every day, it sucks about as much as being an egg-bound chicken with a Pit Bull on her tail!"

"Well, why eat the grain that the master provides instead of just eating your own goodies?" I ask.

"That's a silly question," she replies, "I don't have freedom beyond this fence; And, I don't have to think about scratching too much because I know I can walk over to that feeder; I see you work harder, so I automatically work less. I know a hand-out is coming my direction, so I don't fret about things such as scratching from dawn to dusk. Besides, I am not free, I'm a chicken owned by you backyarders, so my main sustenance is no longer my concern, it's yours."

Lil Red seems to be too complacent with her provisions, "Aren't you concerned that all those hand-outs might come with a high cost? What if, tomorrow, the master decides you look perfect for the frying pan?"

Lil Red blinks a few times and says, "That's silly. Besides, I don't think about tomorrow, it's too far away. Who thinks about tomorrow when you can get freebies today?"

From the corner of the yard, I hear Big Momma screech, "Hey! The way I look at it, I am not getting a hand-out!" Big Momma runs up to me while squawking louder in my direction, "You come out of your big coop every day and since we're all running this company called a 'family' I know I've got to do my part to get that feed, so I lay an egg."

Good point Big Momma. You are contributing, indeed.

I look at Lil Red and ask, "Have you laid that egg today?"

Lil Red says, "He he ha he he ha...Who's counting? Uh, by the way, you're not cooking fried chicken for dinner tonight...Right?" 

 

 



#74 - Interview with a Chicken - Quiet Dignity Reigns

In the backyard, a little trainer plane could easily be seen flying over the yard. It's a beautiful day to be soaring in the sky. Finally, the plane passes over my house. I hope they have their bags packed and are going somewhere fun!

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Speaking of fun, when you have chickens in the backyard, you get to experience moments like below...poop on the threshold of the door. Our chickens watch us walk inside and they run to the back door to follow us inside, but they get a door closed on them. So, they actually sit at the door and peck on it. 

If you think that this has a bit of a Stephen King edge to it, so do I. I try to ignore the subtle pecking sounds on the door as I wash the dishes. 

Since we don't let them inside, I think the chickens say, "Fine, we'll play your game...here's a little present for you the next time you step out onto MY side of the door."

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Chickens aren't as bird-brained as I had originally thought. They know the lay of the land. They know their boundaries. Their food zone is sacred. They search for and find the most shaded spots in our yard and this usually means that they hang out beneath the towering elephant plants. If Deputy Dave goes into the backyard to do some gardening, they stay on his heels because they've learned that he turns the earth and they get to eat all of the goodies that suddenly have become topsoil. They gently eat feed out of my four-year old niece's hand, but they love to give Deputy Dave a memorable peck to keep him in line.

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FOLKS...NOW IT'S TIME FOR...

INTERVIEW with a CHICKEN 

Up close and personal discussions between Lana and a Chicken.

Since I value the intelligence of our feathered backyard friends, I attempted to conduct an interview with Miss Speckles on world matters...we began with a discussion about the current state of international economics, but she appeared rather jittery.

Getting straight to the point, I asked, "Miss Speckles, could you share some of your valuable insight as it relates to the declining world market?"

Miss Speckles considered my weighty question, but she was too dignified to answer, and I admire her introspective stance.

I could tell that this topic is touchy for her, probably because she has relatives worldwide; she is diplomatic and does not want to step on anyone's chicken toes.

So, I tried another angle, a new topic..."Miss Speckles, what is your expert opinion considering controversy over Global Warming and farm animals?"

In a huff, Miss Speckles marched away, one high step followed another. It seemed she thought I was going to lump her into the same category as cows; she wrongly concluded that I was eager to partly blame chicken poop as a contributing factor to our Global Warming debate.

The hurt feelings she displayed on behalf of verbally assaulted farm animals in this debate over Global Warming was palpable. I tried to apologize for the insinuation, but she would hear no more. The interview was clearly over.

Still, I tried to get closer so that I could make a heart-felt apology for the touchy interview session, but she kept eluding me with her fancy footwork...making it clear that she had, "No Comment."



I shall not be dissuaded in my attempt to obtain the truth. Tomorrow will be another day, with a fresh set of hard-hitting questions, and I am positive that my Chicken Interviews will eventually pay off.

Have a great day everyone!